24 May 2014

It had been a long long time..

that i never wrote on blog..

recently moved on to my tertiary studies,

at TAR UC..

it wasn't bad over there..

Today not going to talk much about this.

Currently not really having a good mood.

The time now is 00:04 ...

It's a new day now..

but wont be a new life for a new day..

still being so DOWNNNN..

Yesterday,after sending her to home..

on the way to pick up W.A. ..

it'd been a long n complicated journey..

it ended up to be about 1.5 hours to reach his home..

it was partly due to the traffic jam at this setapak kl area..

especially during that time.. Zzzzzz..

As a result, I ended up to be unable to contact her by sms..

i knw it had been quite a time that i didnt message to her..

i realised that. but this traffic is not allowing me to do anything to contact her. And that complicated process while searching for W.A. ...

She got mad at me.. i knw she's so worried.

I really know that.. but i just cant help with it.

So when i reach a junction, I tried to phone her,but she can't answer..

When i get backed to my aunt home, I tried my best to explain everything that i faced to her, one by one, bit by bit..

But.. I'm not sure whether she do really considering / accept it or not..

When i found W.A. and pick him up, my car was in middle of the road, so I hv to immediately forward my car to avoid traffic jam.

And the worse fact was the damn terrible traffic jam at the LRT area and WM area due to renovation on road.

Had a terrible time overthere...

For now... I had a quarrel with her..

I hope she can understand my hard situation.

I can't simply stop my car and send a msg to her..

She said I just dont know about her feelings...

Maybe ... for her , I am a bf who don't understand her...

But I didnt blame her for that..

Maybe , I am not good enough.. to own her..

maybe.......... I am just sucks ?

I started to get confused...

What's the correct and wrong choices...

Should I just stop the car and send a msg to her..

I really dn knw..

When I opened her fb and saw plenty of conversations between her and other guys..

I really got jealous.. she didnt even told my anything about those..

And when I ask her.. I understood on that moment..

Maybe those were just some normal phenomenon. There isn't a necessity to inform / tell me..

Alright , I understand. You'll have your own freedom..

Maybe.. I blocked ur own freedom..

Made u feel uneasy, Made u feel controlled.

It's ok...

I admit I am selfish..

Maybe, I have no right, to get jealous..

I will give u the freedom you want..

I wont simply open ur inbox anymore...

Really feel tired now..

totally exhausted..

woke up early morning..

driving..

classes..

driving for a long time.. seriously exhausting..

tired now, yet doesn't feel wanna sleep...

tmr hv to wake up early..

but just cant make myself into bed..

This feel isn't good.. AT ALL..

It's just like.. feeling lost..

I lost my direction...

What's the right and wrong...

I really didnt blame u for being worried..

I just hope u listen to my explanation.. at least listen to it..

Or I am just so bad.. so not worthy to trust on...??

I know.. 

I am not good..

I am under qualified..

Sorry,

for being a bad, sucks , disappointing bf..

SORRY...

maybe..

u wouldn't want to chat on me anymore..

maybe..

I shouldn't disturb you, and bring more troubles and worries to you..

maybe.. you are right..

you dont want to talk to me anymore..

is the right choice..

maybe i just dont deserve it..

SORRY..

i will get away..

so you won't have these kinds of troubles anymore..

hope you like this colour of font? :')

SORRY,MY GIRL...

GOODBYE........